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054 – Suicide

Content Warning

This comic contains conversations about suicide.

If you are struggling with suicidal thoughts, please reach out to help lines or emergency services locally to you.

For Swedes: Nummer till hjälplinjer och andra resurser.

Content warning: This comic contains discussions of suicide. Please proceed with caution. Hello, kiddos. I had a different topic planned for today, but then I got a question that I felt couldn't wait. Today we're going to talk about suicide. If this is too tough a topic for you, please skip this one. I'll see you next time, for something different. Useless asks: I'm not sure how to best pose this question, but since you've covered depression and it resonated with me... I wonder what you think of suicide? I'm forty years old and I'm an absolute mess. I just don't see the point. I guess my question is, what do we do when we don't want to try any longer? I know it's selfish, I don't want to hurt others around me, but I'm so tired. Sorry, this is probably not fair on you and so I should qualify that I'm safe and have no immediate plans... I just wish I was not here. Before we start I want to make a couple of things clear. I am not a mental health professional. If you feel that you are in danger, please reach out to people who can help you. That said, I have no problem talking about difficult things. I think it's very important that nothing is taboo here. If you just want to talk to someone, you can email me. It doesn't have to become a comic, it can just be between us. My goal with this comic - and with my life - is to provide space to talk about anything. I will always listen. I will always try to help, the best I can. Without judgment. To answer your question... I have loved ones who have been suicidal. There have been times in my life when I felt like there was no other way out. I understand where you are coming from. I believe very strongly that we as humans should have a right to end things on our own terms. There are situations where prolonging life cannot be the only answer. But depression is an arrogant beast. It makes us think we are the only ones who has ever felt this way. It makes us believe nothing will ever change. This moment right now is how life will be forever. But other than in some very specific situations, that's not true. Life changes constantly, for better and for worse. Tomorrow is going to be different. In almost every situation, suicide is a permanent solution to a temporary problem. Every time I've felt like this is it, I can't go on and then stuck around anyway... Things changed. I met people I never would've met, had I taken that step. I've made art that would not exist. This comic, for example. If you are not one hundred percent convinced, without a single doubt in your bones, then it is not the right choice. You are not out of options. You may have noticed that I'm not talking that much about the impact suicide has on your friends and family. I suspect you already know, but also... I don't think guilt is helpful when you're already struggling. That said, if you are worried about how this would hurt your loved ones, the easiest way to avoid that is to reach out. Talk to a friend, a professional, anyone you trust to help you through this time. I know it's scary. I know it seems like there are easier solutions. But please try. I want you to still be here tomorrow. That's it for today, kiddos. I am so proud of you for reaching out and asking your questions. I do not take this responsibility lightly. Take care of yourself out there. I love you, with my whole heart.